(de)Classified
Apocalypse, Now Affordable
Are you tired of the same mundane tours that promise to show you the real Vietnam? For a remarkably affordable price (airfare not included), Apocalypse Tours offers you an opportunity to encounter a nation being torn apart by the most photogenic war in the history of modern cinema: Vietnam, exactly as Francis Ford Coppola pictured it. more »
B tty
I live at 801 Imperial House, Munhall Road, a condo-only complex. The key doesn’t work. 401. Identical carpeted hallways with identical wood doors. I’m sure of the one part. 701? 601? I have lived here for fifteen years. My children suggested I move here in order to “make things easier.” For whom? I wondered. I keep the guest bedroom for my black Steinway. I played lullabies on it for Marcia when she was a little girl. Hush little baby, don’t say a word, Momma’s going to buy you a... more »
Taking Roots
“From the desert, the dawn of a new age shines upon humanity, the age of the masses.” - Colonel Muammar Qaddafi 1. Depending on where you are in the world the name will begin differently. Sometimes it is hit with a sallow… more »
Breach
The girl who is reading outside the window on the small terraced balcony in the hour or so after sunrise, wind a kind of fist pressed or pressing against her chest, turns a page. Fingers slip between the seams of the book, lift as if to examine a fallen leaf in a courtyard far from trees. A corner flutters, flaps resistance. more »
I Hope It's Not A Frankenstein
I'm workin' on a heart. It's gonna love watch what I tell you. It's gonna love for me. And receive love. Better than I did the first time. Been workin' on it. It's almost finished, almost whole. Gonna pop that sucker in, wind it up, beat beat. So I can love. more »
My Life Minus You
I have become a turned chair, a chair that sits pretty in the corner, a piece of furniture, ignored. I am somebody’s ghost, haunting preferred to a holding, I am no longer tactile, invisible. I am a headless flower, dried out in a scum filled vase; I have become next week’s mulch, unbelievable. What has become of me? more »
Two Monologues of Mrs. O'Reilly
Do you know what it is to “flee”? Perhaps not, since all of your ilk are transfixed by screens and it’s doubtless difficult to animate a first-class flee, though I suppose some brainy little git is even now adjusting his quadrants and trying. You have no range yet, nor do you have the historical reach essential to the finer aspects of theatrical flight. Flouncing you do well enough. I’ve admired your overblown, hand-to-forehead imitation of Jo March’s triumph of overacting. The... more »
More Adventure Comics
Panel 1: Captain Lightning holds Professor Spiralmind by the front of his lab coat, dangling the villain’s body over the ledge of his observatory hideout, as lightning flashes in the background. Rain has matted Captain Lightning’s black hair against his forehead, but it doesn’t obscure his eyes, which are round and focused. more »
A Collection of Glimpses and Two Other Audio Pieces by Michael K. Meyers
This month’s (de)Classified is a selection of audio pieces by Michael K. Meyers. If you enjoy these, check out Meyers’ previously published work with... more »
The Bob Ross Underground Tape Exchange
THRD SEASON JOY OF PAINTING CLIFFHANGER FINALE: This is old VHSx5+ C- but high vocal resonance (about 9-10, Quidd). Im not into zen meditation but my bf. says its hot shit, a BR classic. like delayed male orgasm he says! ; o Will trade or sell. CONTACT. PS thanks everyone this site saved my life. looking forward to many more trades!!! <3 more »
The Tamiami Trail (Mix): U.S. Route 41, Miami to Michigan
I. Two alligators pass each other and flash a secret greeting, like bikers. They stop for gas in Big Cypress Swamp. The woman who owns the station dishes about the best location to spot a panther. (Photo of old timey gas station) Supreme Unleaded is… more »
Under Joe's Volcano
In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was the light that would shine in the darkness, even to the ends of the Restaurant, but the darkness did not comprehend the light, nor the Restaurant the Word nor I the Restaurant,… more »
Little Bombs of Heaven: Aphorisms
I don’t hate you, but if you were me, you would hate you. more »
The Cherry Tree
Everyone knows the story, but no one knows how it actually happened. The story is that George chopped down the cherry tree, and said, “Father, I cannot tell a lie, it was I who chopped down the cherry tree.” Here is how it actually happened. more »
Zuhitsu: A London Cypriot Perspective
Went into the office today hoping that I would receive some news about my salary — hoping that it would have been banked by now. I hear a fellow peer decided to commit suicide on a Sunday. I instantly forget about the salary. Awkward how death makes one forget. I can’t seem to get the tragedy out of my head. Nonetheless, I don’t want to intellectualize the situation. Should we all be nihilists/Nietzscheans? To decide that morals have no value; wouldn’t that make me an animal? more »
The Manifold Dimensions of z (or Methuselah’s Voice-Over)
ACT I [The voices contained herein are self-contained and non-differentiated but are unique like crystals or fractals, which are neither unique nor practical. As you will find out, or have already discovered, Meta and I were in love and somewhat obsessed with magic and the manifold dimensions of z. This final act, which is really the first act, takes place in 2-space and 3-space, which are like parallel worlds that are unaware of the other but are layered on top of each other like minks or... more »
A Sail
Thor never got used to those Norwegian winters. Months of half-light and soft bark. But his fire smoldered on, year after year, until one fresh June day brought a breakthrough in Thor’s plans to float away from the steely fjords… more »
Cake it!
Thea Zimmer’s decades of employment in an increasingly “feminized” corporate America provides the fodder for Cake It! In the vignettes that make up Cake It!—the jottings that bring together the real life, the overheard, the imagined—Zimmer presents an unapologetic work… more »